Sunday, December 16, 2012

True Love - Don't read you will regret and ask why i don't read.A long story but worthy to be read . Take  your  time and read to the end .   Dear All,  Please read = even if you have to miss your favourite TV programme.

Just two years after our marriage, hubby brought up the idea of asking Mother to move from the rural hometown and spend her remaining years with us.

 

Hubby's father passed away while he was still very young. Mother endured much hardship and struggled all on her own to provide for him, see him through to a university degree.

 

You could say that she suffered a great deal and did everything you could expect of a woman to bring hubby to where he is today.

  
I immediately agreed and started packing the spare room, which has a balcony facing the South to let her enjoy the sunshine and plant greenery.

Hubby stood in the bright room, and suddenly just picked me up and started spinning round and round.

As I begged him to put me down, he said: "Lets go fetch mother." Hubby is tall and big sized and I love to test on his chest and enjoy the feeling that he could pick me up at any moment put the tiny me into his pockets.

 
Whenever we have an argument and both refuses to back down, he would pick me up and spin me over his head continuously until I surrender and beg for mercy.

I became addicted to this kind of panic-joy feeling.

Mother brought along her countryside habits and lifestyle with her. 
 

For example; I am so used to buying flowers to decorate the living room, she could not stand it and would comment:

 

"I do not know how you young people spend your money, why do you buy flowers for?  You also can't eat flowers!" I smiled and said: "Mum, with flowers in the house, our mood will also become better."

 

Mother continues to grumble away, and hubby smiled: "Mum, this is a city-people's habit; slowly you will get use to it."

 

Mother stopped saying anything. But every time thereafter, whenever came home with flowers, she would ask me how much it costs.

 

I told her and she would shake her head and express displeasure.

 

Sometimes, when I come home with lots of shopping bags, she would ask each and every item how much they cost, I would tell her honestly and she would get even more upset about it.

 

Hubby playfully pinched my nose and said: "You little fool, just don't tell her the full price of everything would solve it."

 

There begins the friction to our otherwise happy lifestyle.

 

Mother hates it most when hubby wakes up early to prepare the breakfast.

 

In your view, how could the man of the house cook for the wife?

 

At the breakfast table, mother facial expression is always like the dark clouds before a thunderstorm and I would pretend not to notice.

 

She would use her chopsticks and make a lot of noise with it as her silent protest.

 

As I am a dance teacher in the Children's Palace and am exhausted from along day of dancing around, I do not wish to give up the luxury of that additional few minutes in the comfort of my bed and hence I turned a deaf ear to all the protest mother makes.

 
From time to time, mother would help out with some housework, but soon her help created additional work for me.

For example: she would keep all kinds of plastic bags accumulating them so that she sell them later on, and resulted in our house being filled with all the trash bags; she would scrimp on dish washing detergent when helping to wash the dishes and so as not to hurt her feelings, I would quietly wash them again.

One day, late at night, mother saw me quietly washing the dishes, and "Bam" she slams her bedroom door and cried very loudly in her room.

Hubby was placed in a difficult position, and after that, he did not speak to me for that entire night.

I pretended to be a spoilt child, tried acting cute, but he totally ignored me....


I got mad and asked him: "What did I do wrong?" Hubby stared at me and said: "Can't you just give in to her once?   We couldn't possibly die eating from a bowl however unclean it is, right?"

 After that incident, for a long period of time, mother did not speak to me and you can feel that there is a very awkward feeling hanging in the house.

During that period of cold war, hubby was caught in dilemma as to who to please.

In order to stop her son from having to prepare breakfast, mother took on the  ' all important '  task of preparing breakfast without any prompting.

At the breakfast table, mother would look at hubby happily eating his breakfast and cast that reprimanding stare at me for having failed to perform my duty as a wife.

To avoid the embarrassing breakfast situation, I resorted to buying my own breakfast on my way to work.

That night, while in bed, hubby was a little upset and asked me:

"LD, is it because you think that mum's cooking is not clean that's why you chose not to eat at home?"

He then turned his back on me and left me alone in tears as feeling of unfairness overwhelmed me.

After some time, hubby sighed: "LD, just for me, can you have breakfast at home?"

I am left with no choice but to return to the breakfast table.

The next morning, I was having porridge prepared by mother and I felt a sudden churn in my stomach and everything inside seem to be rushing up my throat.

I tried to suppress the urge to throw up but I could not.   I threw down the bowl, rushed into the washroom, and vomited everything out..

Just as I was catching my breath, I saw mother crying and grumbling very loudly in her dialect, hubby was standing at the washroom doorway staring at me with fire burning in his eyes...

I opened my mouth but no words came out of it, I really did not mean it.

We had our very first big fight that day; mother took a look at us, then stood up and slowly made her way out of the house.

Hubby gave me a final stare in the eye and followed mother down the stairs.

For three days, hubby did not return home, not even a phone call.

I was so furious, since mother arrived; I had been trying my best and putting up with her, what else do you want me to do?

For no reason, I keep having the feeling to throw up and I simply have not appetite for food, coupled with all the events happening at home, I was at then low point in my life.. 
 

Finally, a colleague said: "LD, you look terrible; you should go and see a doctor."

 

The doctor confirmed that I am pregnant.

 

Now it became clear to me why I threw up that fateful morning, a sense of sadness floated through that otherwise happy news.

 

Why didn't hubby, and mother who had been through this before, thought of the possibility of this being the reason that day?

At the hospital entrance, I saw my hubby standing there..

It had only been three days, but he looked haggard. I had wanted to turn and leave, but one look at him and my heart soften, I couldn't resist and called out to him.

 
He followed my voice and finally found me but he pretended that he doesn't know me; he has that disgusted look in his eyes that cut right through my heart.

I told myself not to look at him anymore, and hail a cab.

At that moment, I have such a strong urge inside me to shout to my hubby: "Darling, I am having your baby!" and have him lift me up and spin me around in circles of joy.

What I wanted didn't happen and as I sat in the cab, my tears started rolling down.

Why? Why our love couldn't even withstand the test of one fight?

Back home, I lay on the bed thinking about my hubby, and the disgusted look in his eyes.

I cried and wet the corner of the blanket.

That night, sound of the drawers opening woke me up.

I switched on the lights and I saw hubby with tears rolling down his face.

He was removing the money. I stared at him in silence; he ignored me, took the bank deposit book and some money and left the house.

Maybe he really intends to leave me for good.

What a rational man, so clear-cut in love and money matters.

I gave a few dried laugh and tears starting streaming down again.

The next day, I did not go to work. I wanted to clear this out and have a good talk with hubby.

I reached his office and his secretary gave me a weird look and said:

"Mr. Tan's mother had a traffic accident and is now in the hospital."

I stood there in shock. 
 

I rushed to the hospital and by the time I found hubby, mother had already passed away.

 

Hubby did not look at me, his face was expressionless.

 

I looked at mother's pale white and thin face and I couldn't control the tears in my eyes.

 

My god, how could this happen?

 

Throughout the funeral, hubby did not say a single word to me, with only the occasional disgusted stare at me.

 

I only managed to find out brief facts about the accident from other people.

 

That day, after mother left the house, she walked in dazed toward the bus stop, apparently intending to go back to her old house back in the countryside.

 

As hubby ran after her, she tried to walk faster and as she tried to cross the street, a public bus came and hit her....

 

I finally understood how much hubby must hate me, if I had not thrown up that morning, if we had not quarreled, if....

 

In his heart, I am indirectly the killer of his mother.

 

Hubby moved into mother's room and came home every night with a strong liquor smell on him.

 

And me, I am buried under the guilt and self-pity and could hardly breathe.

 

I wanted to explain to him, tell him that we are going to have our baby soon, but each time, I saw the dead look in his eyes, all the words I have at the brink of my mouth just fell back in.

 

I had rather he hit me real hard or give me a big and thorough scolding though none of these events happening had been my fault at all.

 

Many days of suffocating silence went by and as the days went by, hubby came home later and later..

 

The deadlock between us continues, we were living together like strangers who don't know each other.

 

I am like the dead knot in his heart.

 

One day, I passed by a western restaurant, looking into the glass window, I saw hubby and a girl sitting facing each other and he very lightly brushed her hair for her, I understood what it meant.

 

After recovering from that moment of shock, I entered the restaurant, stood in front of my hubby and stared hard at him, not a tear in my eyes.

 

I have nothing to say to him, and there is no need to say anything.

 

The girl looked at me, looks at hubby, stands up and wanted to go, hubby stretched out his hand and stopped her.

 

He stared back at me,challenging me.

 

I can only hear my slow heart beat, beating, one by one as if at the brink of death.

 

I eventually backed down, if I had stood that any longer, I will collapse together with the baby inside me.

 

That night, he did not come home; he had chosen to use that as a way to indicate to me: Following mother's death so did our love for each other.

 

He did not come home anymore after that.

 

Sometimes, when I returned home from work, I can tell that the cupboard had been touched - he had returned to take some of his stuff.

 

I no longer wish to call him; the initial desire to explain everything to him vanished.

 

I lived alone; I go for my medical checkups alone, my heart breaks again and again every time I see a guy carefully helping his wife through the physical examination.

 

My office colleagues hinted to me to consider aborting the baby, I told them  " No, I will not.. " 

 

I insisted on having to this baby, perhaps it is my way of repaying mother for causing her death.

 

One day, I came home and I saw hubby sitting in the living room.

 

The whole house was filled with cigarette smoke.

 

On the coffee table, there was this piece of paper.

 

I know what it is all about without even looking at it.

 

In the two months plus of living alone, I have gradually learned to find peace within myself.

 

I looked at him, removed my hat and said: "You wait a while, I will sign."

 

He looked at me, mixed feelings in his eyes, just like mine..

 

As I hang up my coat, I keep repeating to myself "You cannot cry, you cannot cry...." my eyes hurt terribly, but I refused to let tears come out from there.

 

After I hung up my coat, hubby's eyes stared fixed at my bulging tummy. I smiled, walked over to the coffee table and pulled the paper towards me..

 

Without even looking at what it says, I signed my name on it and pushed the paper to him. "LD, are you pregnant?"

 

Since mother's accident, this is the first time he spoke to me. I could not control my tears any further and they fell like raindrops.

 

I said: "Yes, but its ok, you can leave now."

 

He did not go.

 

In the dark, we sat, facing each other.

 

Hubby slowly moved over me, his tears wet the blanket.

 

In my heart, everything seems so far away, so far that even if I sprint, I could never reach them.

 

I cannot remember how many times he repeated "sorry" to me.

 

I had originally thought that I would forgive him, but now I can't.

 

In the western restaurant, in front of that girl, that cold look in his eyes, I will never forget, ever.

 

We have drawn such deep scars in each other's heart.

 

For me, it's unintentional; for him, totally intentional.

 

I had been waiting for this moment of reconciliation, but I realized now, what had gone past is gone forever and could not repeated.

 

Other than the thought of the baby inside me that would bring some warmth to my heart, I am totally cold towards him, I no longer eat anything he buys for me, I don't take any presents from him and I stopped talking to him.

 

From the moment I signed on that piece of paper, marriage and love had vanished from my heart.

 

Sometimes, hubby will try to come into the bedroom, but when he walks in, I will walk out to the living room.

 

He had no choice but to sleep in mother's room.

 

At night, from his room, I can hear light sounds of groaning, I kept quiet.

 

This used to be his trick; last time, whenever I ignore him, he would fake illness and I will surrender and find out what is wrong with him, he would then grab me and laugh.

 

He has forgotten that last time I cared for him and am concerned because there was love, but now, what is there between us?

 

Hubby's groaning came on and off continuing but I continuously ignored him.

 

Almost everyday, he would buy something for the baby, infant products, children products and books that kids like to read.

 

Bags and bags of it stacked inside his room till it is full.

 

I know he is trying to use this to reach out to me, but I am no longer moved by his actions.

 

He has no choice but to lock himself in his room and I can hear his typing away on his computer keyboard, maybe he is now addicted to web surfing but none of that matters to me anymore.

 

It was sometime towards the end of Spring in the following year, one late night, I screamed because of a sudden stomach pain, hubby came rushing into the room, its like he did not change and sleep, and had been waiting for this moment.

 

He carried me and ran down the stairs, stopped a car, holding my hand very tightly and kept wiping the sweat off my brow, throughout the journey to the hospital.

 

Once we reached the hospital, he carried me and hurried into the delivery suite.

 

Lying on the back of his skinny but warmth body, a thought crossed my mind:

 

In my lifetime, who else would love me as much as he did?

 

He held the delivery suite door opened and watch me go in; his warm eyes caused me to manage a smile at him despite my contraction pain.

 

Coming out of the delivery room, hubby looked at our son and me, eyes tear with joy and he kept smiling.

 

I reached out and touched his hand.. Hubby looked at me, smiling and then he slowly collapsed onto the floor.

 

I cried out for him in pain... He smiled, but without opening that tired eyes of his...


I had thought that I would never shed any tear for him, but the truth is, I have never felt a deeper pain cutting through my body at that moment.

Doctor said that by the time hubby discovered he had liver cancer, it was already in terminal stage and it was a miracle that he managed to last this long.

 

I asked the doctor when he first discovered he had cancer. Doctor said about 5 months ago and consoled me saying:

 

"Prepare for his funeral."


I disregarded the nurse's objection and rushed home, I went into his room and checked his computer, and a suffocating pain hits me.

Hubby's cancer was discovered 5 months ago, his groaning was real, and

 

I had thought that... the computer showed over 200 thousand

PART TWO True Love - Don't read you will regret and ask why i don't read.A long story but worthy to be read . Take  your  time and read to the end .   Dear All,  Please read = even if you have to miss your favourite TV programme.

PART TWO

Prepare for his funeral."


I disregarded the nurse's objection and rushed home, I went into his room and checked his computer, and a suffocating pain hits me.

Hubby's cancer was discovered 5 months ago, his groaning was real, and

 

I had thought that... the computer showed over 200 thousand words he wrote for our son:

 

"Son, just for you, I have persisted, to be able to take a look at you before I fall, is my biggest wish now...

 

I know that in your life, you will have many happiness and maybe some setbacks, if only I can accompany you throughout that journey, how nice would it be..

 

But daddy now no longer has that chance.


Daddy has written inside here all the possible difficulties and problems you may encounter during your lifetime, when you meet with these problems, you can refer to daddy's suggestion....

Son, after writing these 200 thousand words, I feel as if I have accompanied you through life journey.

 

To be honest, daddy is very happy.

 

Do love your mother, she has suffered, she is the one who loves you most and also the one who loves me most....

 

" From play school to primary school, to secondary, university, to work and even in dealing with questions of love, everything big and small was written there.

 

Hubby has also written a letter for me:
"My dear, to marry you is my biggest happiness, forgive me for the pain I have caused you, forgive me for not telling you my illness, because I want to see you be in a joyful mood waiting for the arrival of our baby....

 

My dear, if you cried, it means that you have forgiven me and I would smile, thank you for loving me...

 

These presents, I'm afraid I cannot give them to our son personally, could you help me to give some of them to him every year, the dates on what to give when are all written on the packaging... "

 

Going back to the hospital, hubby is still in coma.

 

I brought our son over and place him beside him.

 

I said: "Open your eyes and smile, I want our son to remember being in the warmth of your arms..."

 

He struggled to open his eyes and managed a weak smile.

 

Our son still in his arms was happily waving his tiny hands in the air. I press the button on the camera and the sound of the shutter rang through the air as tears slowly rolled down my face.....

 

A fatal misunderstanding and the person who loves me the most in this world is gone forever...

 

"Cruel misunderstandings one after another disrupted the blissful footsteps to our family.

 

Our original intend of having Mother enjoy some quiet and peaceful moments in her remaining years with us went terribly wrong as destiny's secret is finally revealed at a price, every thing became too late.".......


------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

This is a true story.

LEARNING POINT - DO NOT EVER HOLD ON TO GRUDGES. I am totally speechless, this story brought tears to my eyes as I read through each line eager to know what would happen next. It truly showed the devastating power of grudges and anger!

 

Simple humility and communication would have resolved most of the problems in that story, as well as patience.....

 

This story has really touched my heart and life as a whole and it has stimulated a paradigm shift.

 

Though it is very sad, it is also very refreshing to know that from today, I can consciously start to live a life free of grudge.

 

In life, offenses are inevitable.


But holding a grudge is a choice we consciously make. Learn to LET GO....

To forgive others is to forgive YOURSELF. No one's perfect.

 

Communication is the key. It is never toooooo late to be friends.....

 

 

 

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

How To Motivate Yourself To Workout

How To Motivate Yourself To Workout
Sometimes all it takes is a little motivation to get you back on track and back in the gym. Instead of leaving you with just a few ways to get motivated, I have put together a list of 27 ways that you can use to motivate yourself to workout. Some of these are ones I personally use, while others were shared by friends, family, and clients.
After reading through this list, you should never have a problem motivating yourself to workout:
1. Set a goal that you really want to achieve. The most successful people that I have trained were ones with a specific goal in mind. Whether this is losing 15 pounds of fat or gaining 10 pounds of muscle, goals will help keep you motivated. Be sure to set a realistic time frame on your goal so it is not left open ended. Open-ended goals never seem to get finished.
2. Set a destination. Along the same lines as setting a goal, a destination is attainting a goal before a certain event: a family trip, a wedding, 50th birthday, grandbaby being born, etc. Having a destination will force you to stay on track, as there is a set date that you need to be ready by. If you do not have any destinations in the near future, set one. Set up a weekend getaway, plan on seeing a friend you haven't seen in a while, plan a trip, etc.

3. Find a partner. Nothing will keep you more motivated than a great workout partner. Find someone who loves fitness and latch onto him or her. Allow them to push you in workouts and learn all you can from them (assuming they know what they are talking about.) This is how my journey started when I put on 30 pounds of muscle in three months. I knew my good friend Levi was very knowledgeable about health and fitness, plus he pushed himself very hard in every workout. I joined forces with him and my other friend Brian, and we went to work!
4. Start eating better. When you eat better, you feel better. This will then lead to having more energy. When you eat bad, you will find that your motivation drops terribly. Start focusing on eating real foods the majority of the time, and watch as you start hitting the gym more often and with much more energy.
5. Compete. There is nothing like some good ol' competition to keep you motivated. Challenge a friend or co-worker to see who can stay the strongest to their workout plan. Note that this does not say, "who can workout the most" as this will only lead to overtraining. Set up 3-5 workouts a week and see who can stick to the plan. This will hold you accountable, as no one likes losing a competition.
6. Reward yourself. Rewards are huge especially when you are just starting out. When I began, my reward was the gratification of knowing that I became a stronger and better basketball player from my workouts. Now, I find rewards in many different ways: a rest day, a nutrition cheat day, a nice meal out, weekend vacation, etc. Find something to reward yourself with so you can stay motivated and stick with your workouts.
7. Track your progress. When you see written progress on exercises and workouts, you will see that you are improving. Improvements always lead to more motivation because you continually will want better numbers (ie. doing more weight on exercises, more reps than the previous workout, etc.). Track each workout then review your progress on a weekly basis.
8. Take a break. Rest is good! Many times you will find that you are unmotivated because you are simply worn out. Taking a few days off from your workouts will help your body rejuvenate and be ready to go for your next workout. Understand that if you have not worked out in 3 years, this does not apply to you. You may need a vacation from work or life, but certainly not from your lack of workouts.
9. Find the time that works best for you. We all have varying schedules and different times that work better to workout. For example, my wife just cannot find the energy to workout in the afternoon so during the mornings before work is when she goes. On the other hand, there are plenty of people who are not morning people and workout in the afternoon or night. Figure out when you have more energy and time, and get your workout done then.
10. Find inspiration. Inspiration for me comes from my friends who workout hard and eat healthy. I see them getting results so this keeps me motivated to work hard and outdo them. Simply seeing someone who is very fit can be your inspiration or for some just reading an inspirational quote will do the trick. Everyone is different so discover what will inspire you and stick with it.
11. Make it known. Tell everyone you know that you are going to start working out. Post it on Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, etc. This will allow your goals to be out in the open and show others you are serious about doing it. You will be surprised by how much support you will get from family and friends when they see you trying to get fit.
12. Get support. Accomplishing any goal is going to be very tough so that it why it is important to find support on your journey. Get an accountability partner to make sure you stay on track. Or shoot me an email and I'd be glad to support you.
13. Build off your successes. Nothing feels better than having success at something new. Maybe just showing up to a workout is a success, if so, then build off of that. Look for any small successes that will keep you motivated: doing more weight than the previous workout, beating your time on sprints, doing one more rep on an exercise than the time before, etc. Any success is a success, so run with it!
14. Kill the negativity. Negative thoughts and people will come on your journey. Don't allow them to bring you down. Instead, kill those negative thoughts and replace them with positives. Positivity goes a long way so start practicing it in all situations.
15. Think about what you are gaining. When we take on a new task, we often only see the difficulties of that task. We get clouded and don't allow ourselves to see all the amazing benefits that are to come. Working out will lead to more energy, better health, and an overall better life. Don't let the difficulties of getting in shape cloud your final destination.
16. Join a boot-camp. Boot camps are a perfect way to keep you motivated as it forms a community for you to be a part of. Once you get going on the boot camp, the last thing you want to do is disappoint the other boot campers by not showing up. This will hold you accountable and keep you motivated.
17. Get a playlist. Music is a perfect motivator when you do not want to workout. Find a few songs that get you fired up on life, put them on then start driving to your workout. Once you are at the gym you have no other option but to get your workout in.
18. Have answers to your excuses. The excuses are endless that we come up with for not working out. You must know which ones you tend to use the most and prepare a response to shut down that excuse. Don't allow an excuse to get in your way of success. Prepare a response so the excuses have no authority over you.
19. Hire a trainer. For some, just getting to the gym is hard enough. So hiring a trainer will keep you accountable to show up to your workouts. If you simply cannot workout on your own (for whatever reason), find a trainer that will push you and force you to show up.
20. Take a picture. When it comes to working out, people want to see visual results. This is what they measure their successes upon. Although it is not all about looking good (I mean the ultimate goal is always to become more overall healthy), we like to actually see the results we are getting. Taking a picture is a good way to track progress and see how far you have come.
21. Surround yourself with positive people. As was stated earlier, positivity can go a long way. There is just something about positive people that brings out the best in others. Whenever I am feeling down, being around someone (or just talking to someone) that is positive brings my mood right back up. If you feel unmotivated to get in a workout, find someone that is on fire for life and listen to him or her. This will put you in a great mood and motivate you in all areas of your life, including getting that workout in.
22. Start small. Starting small allows you to have immediate success. If you have not worked out in five years, don't expect to just start working out five days a week. Instead, set the goal of working out two days a week for 30 minutes each time. Then you can build up to doing more over time.
23. Visualize your success daily. Many different studies have shown the power of visualization and the impact it can have on the outcomes of your goals. Visualizing your success will keep you motivated each day to keep pushing on towards your ultimate destination. If you ever feel like not working out, try to visualize where you want to be and I can almost guarantee it will change your mind about missing a workout.
24. Don't beat yourself up, pick yourself up. Mistakes happen. Workouts are missed and you will mess up on your nutrition plan. Don't beat yourself up when these things happen. Instead, use it as motivation to get better. If missed workouts start to become a pattern that is when you need to reevaluate what you are doing.
25. Stop the complaining. There is nothing worse than someone that is constantly complaining about everything. It sucks the energy right out of the room. There comes a point when the excuses must stop, and you buckle down and go to work. Complaining will get you nowhere.
26. Do it for the kids. As humans, we are meant to be active. But with technology today, we are becoming more and more sedentary. The kids of this generation have it the worst, and for you parents out there, it is your job to keep them active. Get them involved in sports, go on hikes, go to the pool or beach, or simply go and throw the football around. By keeping your kids active, you are also keeping yourself active. For your motivation, get in good enough shape so that you can always keep up with your kids, no matter what age you are!
27. Don't ever, EVER give up! What is the point of starting something if you are just going to give up half way through? Starting is the easy part, it is the journey that is hard. There will be bumps along the way but know that each time you push past a difficulty, you move one step closer to reaching your goal.
Find what motivates you and get started today. There is no better time than now to start changing your health and your life.
Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless device via Vodafone-Celcom Mobile.

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

11 jenis manusia yang akan menerima doa malaikat.

Disenaraikan antara jenis manusia yang akan menerima doa malaikat.

Ketika kita menghadapi masalah, kerumitan, keperluan dan bimbingan, bukan saja kita perlukan kekuatan doa dari lidah, tetapi juga sokongan malaikat.
Antara orang yang mendapat doa malaikat ialah:

Orang yang tidur dalam keadaan bersuci.Rasulullah s.a.w bersabda, maksudnya: "Sesiapa yang tidur dalam. keadaan suci, malaikat akan bersamanya di dalam pakaiannya. Dia tidak akan bangun hingga malaikat berdoa: "Ya Allah, ampunilah hamba- Mu si fulan kerana tidur dalam keadaan suci."

Orang yang sedang duduk menunggu. waktu solat.Rasulullah s.a.w bersabda maksudnya: "Tidaklah salah seorang. antara kalian yang duduk menunggu solat, selama ia berada dalam keadaan suci, kecuali kalangan malaikat akan mendoakannya: 'Ya Allah, ampunilah ia. Ya Allah sayangilah ia.'"

Orang yang berada di saf depan solat berjemaah.Rasulullah s.a.w bersabda, maksudnya: "Sesungguhnya Allah dan kalangan malaikat-Nya berselawat ke atas (orang) yang berada pada saf. depan."

Orang yang menyambung saf pada solat berjemaah (tidak membiarkan kekosongan di dalam saf).Rasulullah s.a.w bersabda, maksudnya: "Sesungguhnya Allah dan kalangan malaikat selalu berselawat kepada orang yang menyambung saf."

Kalangan malaikat mengucapkan 'amin' ketika seorang imam selesai membaca al-Fatihah.Rasulullah s.a.w bersabda maksudnya: "Jika seorang imam membaca…(ayat terakhir al-Fatihah sehingga selesai), ucapkanlah oleh kamu 'aamiin' kerana sesiapa yang ucapannya itu bertepatan dengan ucapan malaikat, dia akan diampuni dosanya yang lalu."

Orang yang duduk di tempat solatnya
selepas melakukan solat.Rasulullah s.a.w bersabda, maksudnya: "Kalangan malaikat akan selalu berselawat kepada satu antara kalian selama ia ada di dalam tempat solat, di mana ia melakukan solat."

Orang yang melakukan solat Subuh dan Asar secara berjemaah.Rasulullah s.a.w bersabda maksudnya: "Kalangan malaikat berkumpul pada saat solat Subuh lalu malaikat (yang menyertai hamba) pada malam hari (yang sudah bertugas malam hari hingga Subuh) naik (ke langit) dan malaikat pada siang hari tetap tinggal."Kemudian mereka berkumpul lagi pada waktu solat Asar dan malaikat yang ditugaskan pada. siang hari (hingga solat Asar) naik (ke langit) sedangkan malaikat yang. bertugas pada malam hari tetap tinggal l alu Allah bertanya kepada mereka: "Bagaimana kalian meninggalkan hamba-Ku?"Mereka menjawab: 'Kami. datang sedangkan mereka sedang melakukan solat dan kami tinggalkan mereka sedangkan mereka sedang melakukan solat, ampunilah mereka pada hari kiamat.'"

Orang yang mendoakan saudaranya tanpa pengetahuan orang yang didoakan.Rasulullah s.a.w bersabda, maksudnya: "Doa seorang Muslim untuk saudaranya yang dilakukan tanpa pengetahuan orang yang didoakannya adalah doa yang akan dikabulkan. Pada kepalanya ada. seorang malaikat yang menjadi wakil baginya, setiap kali dia berdoa untuk saudaranya dengan sebuah kebaikan, malaikat itu berkata 'aamiin dan engkau pun mendapatkan apa yang ia dapatkan.'"

Orang yang membelanjakan harta (infak).Rasulullah s.a.w bersabda, maksudnya: "Tidak satu hari pun di mana pagi harinya seorang hamba ada padanya kecuali dua malaikat turun kepadanya, satu antara kedua-duanya berkata: 'Ya Allah, berikanlah ganti bagi orang yang berinfak…'"

Orang yang sedang makan sahur.Rasulullah s.a.w bersabda maksudnya: "Sesungguhnya Allah dan kalangan malaikat-Nya berselawat kepada orang yang sedang makan sahur."

Orang yang sedang menjenguk (melawat) orang sakit.Rasulullah s.a.w bersabda, maksudnya: "Tidaklah seorang mukmin menjenguk. saudaranya kecuali Allah akan mengutus 70,000 malaikat untuknya yang akan berselawat kepadanya di waktu siang hingga petang dan di waktu malam hingga Subuh."Itulah antara mereka yang mendapat doa malaikat. Semoga kita termasuk dan tersenarai sama.
Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless device via Vodafone-Celcom Mobile.

Friday, September 7, 2012

The test of true love....to the end.   "......  'Till death do us part..." !

The test of true love....to the end.   "......  'Till death do us part..." !


The Rain
Description:
It was a busy
morning, about 8:30, when an elderly
gentleman in his 80's arrived to have
stitches removed from his thumb.
He said he was in a hurry as he had an
appointment at 9:00 am.
I took his vital
signs and had him take a seat,
knowing it would be over an hour
before someone
would to able to see him.
I saw him looking at his watch and
decided, since I
was not busy with another patient,
I would evaluate his wound.
On exam, it was
well healed, so I talked to one of the
doctors, got the needed supplies to
remove his sutures and redress his wound.

While taking care of
his wound, I asked him if he
had another doctor's appointment
this morning, as
he was in such a hurry.

The gentleman told me no, that he
needed to go to
the nursing home to eat breakfast
with his wife. I enquired as to her
health.
Description:
He told me that she had been there
for a while and that she
was a victim of Alzheimer's Disease.

As we talked, I asked if she would be
upset if he was a bit late.

He replied that she no longer knew
who he was, that she had not
recognised him in
five years now.
Description:
I was surprised, and asked him,
'And you still go every
morning, even though she
doesn't know who you are?'

He smiled as he
patted my hand and said,

'She doesn't
know me, but I still know who she is.'
Description:
I had to hold back
tears as he left, I had goose bumps
on my arm, and thought,

'That is
the kind of love I want in my life.'

True love is
neither physical, nor romantic.
Description:
True love is an
acceptance of all that is,
has been, will be, and will not
be.

With all the jokes
and fun that are in e-mails,
sometimes there is one that comes
along that has an
important message..
This one I thought I could share with you.

The happiest people don't necessarily
have the best of everything;
they just make
the best of everything they have.

I hope you share this with someone you
care about. I just did.
Description:
'Life isn't about
how to survive the storm,
But how to dance
in the rain.'
We are all getting Older
Tomorrow may be our turn.

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Garam

Amalan Rasulullah S.A.W memakan secubit garam sebelum dan selepas makan
kini dibuktikan oleh sains bahawa tabiat ini menambahkan keberkesanan perut
untuk menghadam makanan dan menghindarkan perut dari menyerap racun.

Pada zaman Yunani, Tentera Yunani ( askar Greek ) dibayar gaji menggunakan
garam .Begitu juga dengan episod penjajahan negara kecil oleh negara besar
dengan mengenakan hukuman penjara kepada penentang mereka .

.Apabila dipenjarakan, mereka ( penentang ) akan diberi makanan seperti
roti dan air tanpa garam .Walaupun kerap dihidangkan dengan roti dan air
tanpa garam, badan mereka tetap lemah memandangkan kurangnya kandungan
garam dalam badan.

SUNNAH-SUNNAH BERKAITAN GARAM

Dari Abdullah Bin Umar

" Sesungguhnya ALLAH menurunkan empat perkara berkat ( mempunyai kebaikan )
dari langit ( menerusi hujan ) ke bumi iaitu besi, api ,air dan garam"

Hadis Riwayat Al-Baghawiy dalam tafsirnya .

Dari Anas Bin Malik, nabi bersabda " Penghulu segala lauk pauk kamu ialah
garam ."

Hadis riwayat Ibnu Majah

" Tiadalah akan baik makanan itu melainkan dengan garam "

Antara kegunaan garam dalam perubatan Islam

Dalam kitab perubatan Islam, untuk penyakit dari laut maka untuk
keluarkannya dari badan/merawatnya dari laut juga iaitu menggunakan air
garam. Antaranya:

1. Penyakit Ghaut – timbus anggota badan atau bahagian yang bengkak dengan
pasir laut ( tepi pantai ) 1 – 2 jam kemudian mandi air laut.

2. Kalau tinggal di bandar seperti , goreng 1 – 2 genggam garam kasar
sampai kekuningan kemudian demah/tuam di bahagian yang bengkak atau sakit.
Garam itu dibungkus dengan kain.

3. Guna cara yang sama seperti di atas untuk penyakit lenguh-lenguh sendi,
sakit kepala, senggugut. Kalau sakit lelah demah/tuam pada tapak kaki.

4. Elak mabuk semasa perjalanan dengan meminum madu dan secubit garam atau
air suam dan secubit garam sebelum memulakan perjalanan

5. Mengembalikan tenaga untuk orang yang bekerja berat seperti bertani,
bersukan dan seumpamanya – minum air suam dan sedikit garam.

6. Cuci perut : minum air suam dan satu butir garam kasar sebelah pagi.

Diantara Petua dan kajian

Merendam kerang supaya hilang tahinya. Dalam kaedah perubatan Islam,
sesuatu perkara yang buruk diubat dengan asalnya. Kerang berasal dari laut,
dan garam digunakan untuk meneutralkan keburukannya (tahi).

Mengurang tahap kemasinan ikan masin. Ikan kering yang terlalu masin boleh
dikurangkan kadar kemasinannya dengan merendam dalam air garam juga.

Merawat cirit-birit. Ia boleh diubati dengan meminum air yang dicampur
sedikit garam.

Garam diguna untuk merawat kegatalan. Air yang dicampur garam disapukan
pada kulit yang gatal.

Menambah imuniti badan akibat perubahan hawa/angin. Hal ini berlaku di
sesetengah tempat di negeri Arab. Misalnya pelajar Malaysia yang berkunjung
ke Arab akan mengalami alahan terhadap hawa/angin tempat baharu. Air garam
diminum sebagai ubatnya

Thursday, August 2, 2012

Kesabaran

Kesabaran yang terlampau sering terganggu, meletus menjadi kemarahan yang tiada taranya

Kunci semua hal adalah kesabaran, bukankah anda memperoleh anak ayam dengan jalan mengeram terlebih dahulu dan bukannya dengan memecahkannya

Kesabaran itu pahit, tetapi buahnya manis

Kalau kita kehilangan kesabaran, lawan mendapat kesempatan menghujamkan senjatanya yang paling tajam

Kesabaran adalah kekayaan setiap orang yang tidak dapat dicuri oleh sesiapa pun juga

Kesuksesan terkadang bergantung pada pemahaman jumlah waktu yang diperlukan bagi memperoleh hasil

Kesabaran adalah bunga yang tidak tumbuh di semua kebun

Kebanyakan orang membuat anda sibuk mendengarkan kesulitan mereka tanpa membiarkan anda mempunyai waktu bagi mengutarakan kesulitan anda sendiri

Kesabaran dan tawakal adalah minyak pelincir bagi roda kehidpan

Apabila kesabaran dan rasa terima kasih adalah dua ekor unta betina, yang mana satu perlu kutunggang tidak menjadi masalah

Inti daripada kejernihan akal fikiran adalah adanya sifat penyantun, sedangkan landasan daripada semua perkara adalah kesabaran

Dengan kesabaran kita memperoleh hasil lebih daripada kekuatan kita

Berakhlaklah kamu dengan akhlakku. Salah satu daripada akhlak-akhlakku adalah aku sangat sabar

Betapa susah orang yang tidak punya kesabaran, segala luka hanya dapat sembuh secara perlahan-lahan

Berhati-hatilah dengan orang yang sangat sabar

Anda lebih berhasil apabila menggunakan kesabaran daripada hanya menggunakan bakat

Anda jangan terlalu menginginkan semua berlangsung seperti yang anda kehendaki, tetapi sabarlah dengan kejadian yang berlangsung sebagai apa yang sudah berlangsung sehingga anda tenang dan tenteram

Segala kekejaman, bersumber kelemahan

Jangan membebani kenangan kita dengan kesusahan yang lalu

Yang sukar bagi manusia adalah mengenal dirinya sendiri

Dari http://1001mutiarakata.com/

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Rahsia dan khasiat berzikir dalam kajian sains

FAKTA SAINS SEBENAR

"Otak yang terdiri daripada 15 billion sel (neuron) bertugas untuk menerima dan mengirim maklumat dalam satu sistem saraf yang kompleks.

Sel-sel neuron yang dirangsang dengan sempurna, daya intelek dan fikiran akan tumbuh dan berkembang secara unik. Neuron adalah merupakan unit asas sel otak yang membawa impuls. Ia terdiri dari akson dan dendrit."

Kepentingan Penjagaan Otak

Otak merupakan organ yang mengatur sebahagian besar pergerakan , sikap dan fungsi tubuh seperti degupan jantung, tekanan darah, keseimbangan cecair di dalam tubuh dan kedudukan suhu tubuh seseorang.

Otak juga bertanggungjawab keatas fungsi seperti pengenalan, emosi, ingatan dan segala bentuk pembelajaran (melibatkan kehebatan fungsi otak kiri dan kanan).

DARI SUDUT ISLAM PULA

Didalam "Al-Wabil" yang dikarang oleh Al-Hafiz Ibnu Qayyim telah menyebut akan kelebihan zikrullah itu lebih daripada seratus faedah dan di antaranya ialah:

- Zikir adalah membanting syaitan daripada menghampiri orang yang berzikir

- Zikir melahirkan cinta sejati kepada Allah swt dan cinta itu roh Islam, agama dan sumber kejayaan dan kebahagian. Barangsiapa ingin mendapatkan cinta Allah hendaklah berzikir sebanyak-banyaknya.

- Zikir mendatangkan sikap muraqabah yang membawa seseorang kepada martabat ihsan.

- Zikir membawa seseorang kepada penyerahan diri yang bulat kepada Allah. Dengan ini lama-kelamaan setiap urusan dan setiap keadaan Allah menjadi Pelindung dan Pembantunya.

- Zikir membawa seseorang kepada taqarrub Ilallah.

- Zikir adalah pembuka hijab dan pintu makrifat mengenai Allah.

- Zikir menghidupkan hati. Perumpamaan orang berzikir dan orang yang tidak berzikir adalah seperti orang hidup dan orang mati.

- Zikir adalah santapan roh dan hati. Seandainya keduanya tidak mendapat santapan seumpama jasad tidak mendapat makanan yang akhirnya menjadi lemah.

-Zikir adalah pembersih dan penggilap bagi hati.

- Nur zikir sentiasa bersama dengan orang yang berzikir sama ada di dunia atau di dalam kubur.

- Zikir ibarat pohon. Sewaktu pohon itu besar dan akarnya tertancap kuat, maka buahnya akan bertambah baik. Zikir membuahkan maqam-maqam semuanya dari kesedaran penuh menuju tauhid.

Sepertimana Firman Allah Swt melalui Surah Ar-Ra'd Ayat 28 yang bermaksud:

"Ketahuilah bahawa dengan berzikir kepada Allah itu, jiwa menjadi tenang"

Thursday, June 28, 2012

WAJIB BACA betapa pentingnya Azan...

WAJIB BACA betapa pentingnya Azan...

Assalamualaikum,
Kematian itu pasti akan menjelma. Hanya masa dan waktunya saja yang tak kita ketahui. Cuba kita amati betoi2... pasai apa kebanyakan orang yang nazak,dah hampir sangat dengan ajalnya tak dapat nak berkata apa-apa.... lidahnya kelu, keras dan hanya mimik mukanya saja yang dok menahan kesakitan 'sakaratul maut'.....

Diriwayatkan sebuah hadis yg bermaksud:
"Hendaklah kamu mendiamkan diri ketika azan, jika tidak Allah akan kelukan lidahnya ketika maut menghampirinya."

Ini jelas menunjukkan, bahawa kita disarankan supaya mendiamkan diri dan jangan dok berkata apa-apa pun semasa azan tengah berkumandang....

Sebagai orang yang beragama Islam kita memang wajib menghormati azan. Banyak fadhilatnya.... Kalau lagu kebangsaan kita boleh dok berdiri tegak dan diamkan diri... Pasai apa ketika azan kita tak boleh mendiamkan diri? Lantas sesiapa pun yang berkata-kata ketika azan, Allah akan kelukan lidahnya ketika nazak nanti.....ingat tuuu.....

Kita takut dengan kelunya lidah kita semasa ajal hampir tiba maka kita tidak dapat mengucap kalimah "Lailahaillallah.." yang mana sesiapa yang dapat mengucapkan kalimah ini ketika nyawanya akan dicabut Allah dgn izinNya menjanjikan syurga untuk mereka.

Dari itu marilah kita semua sama-sama menghormati azan dan mohon kepada Allah supaya lidah ini tidak kelu semasa nyawa kita sedang dicabut.

"Ya Allah! Anugerahkanlah kematian kami dengan kematian yang baik lagi mulia, lancarkan lidah kami mengucap kalimah "Lailahaillallah.." semasa sakaratul maut menghampiri kami.

Amin...........

Sunday, May 27, 2012

Diet Rasulullah

Rupanya tanpa kita sadari, dalam makanan yang kita makan sehari-hari, kita tak boleh sembarangan. Hal inilah penyebab terjadinya berbagai penyakit antara lain penyakit kencing manis, lumpuh, sakit jantung, keracunan makanan dan lain2 penyakit. Apabila anda telah mengetahui ilmu ini, tolonglah ajarkan kepada yg lainnya.
Ini pun adalah diet Rasullulah SAW kita juga. Ustaz Abdullah Mahmood mengungkapkan, Rasullulah tak pernah sakit perut sepanjang hayatnya karena pandai menjaga makanannya sehari-hari. Insya Allah kalau anda ikut diet Rasullullah ini, anda takkan menderita sakit perut ataupun keracunan makanan.


Jangan makan SUSU bersama DAGING


Jangan makan DAGING bersama IKAN


Jangan makan IKAN bersama SUSU


Jangan makan AYAM bersama SUSU


Jangan makan IKAN bersama TELUR


Jangan makan IKAN bersama DAUN SALAD


Jangan makan SUSU bersama CUKA


Jangan makan BUAH bersama SUSU CTH :- KOKTEL

· CARA MAKAN
· JANGAN MAKAN BUAH SETELAH MAKAN NASI , SEBALIKNYA MAKANLAH BUAH TERLEBIH DAHULU, BARU MAKAN NASI.
· TIDUR 1 JAM SETELAH MAKAN TENGAH HARI.
· JANGAN SESEKALI TINGGAL MAKAN MALAM . BARANG SIAPA YG TINGGAL MAKAN MALAM DIA AKAN DIMAKAN USIA DAN KOLESTEROL DALAM BADAN AKAN BERGANDA.
· Nampak memang sulit.. tapi, kalau tak percaya... cobalah....................... .............
· Pengaruhnya tidak dalam jangka pendek.... Akan berpengaruh bila kita sudah tua nanti.
· Dalam kitab juga melarang kita makan makanan darat bercampur dengan makanan laut.
· Nabi pernah mencegah kita makan ikan bersama susu. karena akan cepat mendapat penyakit. Ini terbukti oleh ilmuwan yang menemukan bahwa dalam daging ayam mengandung ion+ sedangkan dalam ikan mengandung ion-, jika dalam makanan kita ayam bercampur dengan ikan maka akan terjadi reaksi biokimia yang akan dapat merusak usus kita.
· Al-Quran Juga mengajarkan kita menjaga kesehatan spt membuat
· amalan antara lain:
· Mandi Pagi sebelum subuh, sekurang kurangnya sejam sebelum matahari terbit. Air sejuk yang meresap kedalam badan dapat mengurangi penimbunan lemak. Kita boleh saksikan orang yang mandi pagi kebanyakan badan tak gemuk.
· Rasulullah mengamalkan minum segelas air sejuk (bukan air es) setiap pagi. Mujarabnya Insya Allah jauh dari penyakit (susah mendapat sakit).
· Waktu sembahyang subuh disunatkan kita bertafakur (yaitu sujud sekurang kurangnya semenit setelah membaca doa). Kita akan terhindar dari sakit kepala atau migrain. Ini terbukti oleh para ilmuwan yang membuat kajian kenapa dalam sehari perlu kita sujud. Ahli-ahli sains telah menemui beberapa milimeter ruang udara dalam saluran darah di kepala yg tidak dipenuhi darah. Dengan bersujud maka darah akan mengalir keruang tersebut.
· Nabi juga mengajar kita makan dengan tangan dan bila habis hendaklah menjilat jari. Begitu juga ahli saintis telah menemukan bahwa enzyme banyak terkandung di celah jari jari, yaitu 10 kali ganda terdapat dalam air liur. (enzyme sejenis alat percerna makanan) Wassalam...
· Sama-samalah kita mengamalkannya.......
· WallahuA'lam

Sabda nabi, Ilmu itu milik Allah, barang siapa menyebarkan ilmu demi kebaikan insya Allah... Allah akan menggandakan 10 kali kepadanya.

Monday, May 14, 2012

Pemenang

Dipagi hari cerah cuaca
Diatas bukit dipadang kawad
Disuatu hari penuh acara
pedang diterima sudah berdekad

Friday, April 20, 2012

Diperkenal 2

Tahniah diucapkan tanda penghargaan--Semua tersenyum rasa gembira--Kini menjadi anak kebangaan--Jadi sebutan sanak saudara

Monday, April 16, 2012

Perbarisan

17 Jun diadakan perbarisan
Kedet ditauliah sebagai perwira
Bermula hidup anak warisan
Agar Jasa bakti tidak terkira

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Istilah sains yang digunakan dalam produk yang mengandungi unsur babi

Mungkin banyak umat Islam tidak tahu bahwa label label yang bertulis 'This product contain substance from porcine.Sebenarnya bermaksud 'Produk ini mengandungi bahan daripada babi. Selain itu, antara label yang kerap digunakan adalah 'The source of gelatin capsule is porcine' yang bermaksud 'Kapsul dari gelatin babi.

Berikut antara istilah sains yang digunakan dalam produk yang mengandungi unsur babi:

1. Pork:Istilah yang digunakan untuk daging babi di dalam masakan.

2. Swine:Istilah yang digunakan untuk keseluruhan kumpulan spesis babi.

3. Hog:Istilah untuk babi dewasa, berat melebihi 50 kg.

4. Boar:Babi liar.

5. Lard:Lemak babi yang digunakan bagi membuat minyak masak dan sabun.

6. Bacon:Daging haiwan yang disalai, termasuk babi.

7. Ham:Daging pada bahagian paha babi.

8. Sow:Istilah untuk babi betina dewasa (jarang digunakan).

9. Sow Milk:Susu babi.

10.Pig:Istilah umum untuk seekor babi atau sebenarnya bermaksud babi muda, berat kurang daripada 50 kg.

11.Porcine:Istilah yang digunakan untuk sesuatu yang berkaitan atau berasal daripada babi. Porcine sering digunakan di dalam bidang perubatan untuk menyatakan sumber yang berasal daripada babi.

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

How to get along with your coworkers

How to get along with your coworkers

By Jen Kirsch

Learn six simple ways to improve your professional relationships at work.

For most people, going to work every day means spending time with the same people on a daily basis. And since you spend so much time with your coworkers, it's important that the relationships you have with them are positive ones.

Shannon Waller, the director of new program development at Strategic Coach, offers six simple but effective ways to create camaraderie and develop strong working relationships with your coworkers.

1. Smile and be friendly
If you're the type of person who comes into work and walks straight to your desk, immediately opening up your email and tuning out everything and everyone around you, you might want to reconsider your attitude. Not only does this behaviour isolate you, it isolates others, too.

While you may want to maintain a work-only mentality at the office, smiling and acting friendly toward others will go a long way, says Waller. "Say, 'Good morning. How are you? How's it going?' Be friendly and open," she advises. "You look less intimidating when you smile."

2. Be a team player
Help others when you can. If someone needs help carrying a box or stapling some documents together, or just wants to bounce an idea off of you, make yourself available. "You want to be relied upon to help out when need be," says Waller.

Being available and supportive will help you move ahead in your job and progress in your field. "You'll be perceived as someone who people want to work with," she explains. "You're not just there to check email, you're there to interact as well."

3. Be aware of how you come across
If you are not aware of your body language, you may come across in a way that is unintentional. "Your body language and tone of voice convey more than your actual words. People are listening for that," says Waller. So think before you react and put more effort into creating a friendly impression.

For example, if a coworker comes to talk to you, instead of barking, "What do you want?" ask him politely how you can help. If you're too swamped to chat, let him know that you'd love to talk right now, but you can't, Waller advises. Be sure to provide the reason why and then set a time to reconnect.

4. Don't scare people
People often don't realize when they are taking their own stress and frustrations out on others. There is a right and a wrong way to act around your coworkers. Your best course of action is to always be polite, friendly and genuine. "Own your own emotions, don't impose them on other people," says Waller. When things go wrong, say, "I'm really frustrated" not "You're an idiot." Statements that begin with "I" demonstrate that you are simply stating your feelings, not shifting blame or lashing out, she explains.

5. Take your relationship to the next step
Spend some time with your coworkers away from the office to get to know them better. If you get to know your office mates as human beings instead of just work colleagues, it will make your relationships that much stronger, says Waller. "You are so much more than your role at work, so this will give you the chance to connect," she explains. "Talk to people about things that matter to them. This will make them feel cared about as people, not just for what they can do for you."

6. Be clear about what you want
Make sure that you and your coworkers are on the same page by communicating your ideas and desires clearly. Waller suggests saying something along the lines of: "Just so we are all agreed, we are accomplishing this task to this standard by this timeline, right? Is everyone agreed?" That way you can avoid any potential confusion down the road. Communicating clearly helps ensure there are no assumptions made about a project or task and that everyone understands their roles and expectations. "We often assume, which is a big cause of conflict," Waller explains.

Even though you may have your own work to do, it's still important to connect and build good relationships with the people you work with. The better you get along with your coworkers, the easier your working life will be.

Thursday, March 15, 2012

USIA PERNIKAHAN MEMPENGARUHI KEMESRAAN (ahak,,ahak)

USIA PERNIKAHAN MEMPENGARUHI KEMESRAAN (ahak,,ahak)Usia Pernikahan Mempengaruhi Kemesraan.......

Sebelum Tido:
6 minggu: selamat bobok sayang, mimpi indah ya, mmmuach.
6 bulan: tolong matikan lampu tu, silau ah.
6 tahun : Sanasikit lah... tido kalau tak mengepit tak bole eh???!

Pakai Toilet:
6 minggu: tak apa, u dulu aje lah, i tak buru2 .
6 bulan: masih lama tak nih?
6 tahun: brug! brug! brug! (suara pintu digegar), kalau nak bertapa pi lah gunung ledang sana !!

Balas SMS:
6 minggu: iye sayang, jap lagi i sampai ruma, i beli murtabak kesukaan u..
6 bulan: trafik jam ah
6 tahun: k..

Dating process:
6 minggu: I love U, I love U, I love U.
6 bulan: Of course I love U.
6 tahun : Iyalah!! kalau i tak cintakan u, buat apa i nikah ngan u??

Pulang Keje:
6 minggu: Honey, i dah balik nih....
6 bulan : I'm BACK!!
6 tahun: Masak apa hari ini??

Hadiah (ulang tahun):
6 minggu : Sayang, i harap u menyukai cincin yang i beli
6 bulan : I beli lukisan, nampak sesuai dengan suasana ruang tengah
6 tahun : Nih duit, u beli sendiri lah apa yg u nak..

Telefon:
6 minggu: Baby, ada yang ingin bbual ngan u di telefon nih
6 bulan : Eh...your call...
6 tahun : WOOIII TELFON BUNYI TUUUHHH....ANGKAT AH!!!

Masakan:
6 minggu: Wah, tak sangka i, rasa makanan ini begitu lazaattt...!!!
6 bulan: Kita makan apa malam ini??
6 tahun: HAH? LAUK INI LAGI?

Memaafkan:
6 minggu: Sudahlah, tak apa, dah pecah pun, nanti kita beli lagi eh
6 bulan: Hati-hati! Nanti jatuh tuh.
6 tahun: Orang dah bilang berkali2 pon tak paham!!

Baju baru:
6 minggu: Aduh sayang, u seperti bidadari dengan pakaian itu
6 bulan: Lah.. beli baju baru lagi?
6 tahun: DAH BERAPA RIBU HABIS BELI BAJU TU???

Merancangkan Holiday:
6 minggu: Macam mana kalau kita jalan-jalan ke Amerika atau ke tempat yg u nak honey?
6 bulan: Kita ke Bukit Bintang aje ler ....senang sikit tak perlu naik flight...
6 tahun: JALAN-JALAN??? DUDUK RUMAH AJE TAK BOLEH EH? BUANG DUIT JE!

TV:
6 minggu: Baby, apa yg kita nak tonton malam ini ?
6 bulan : Sekejap eh, citer bagus ah.
6 tahun: JANGAN TUKAR2 BOLE
 

 

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

7 steps to making your dreams come true

7 steps to making your dreams come true

By Laurie Mackenzie

Everyone has a cherished dream. Here are our step-by-step directions to making it happen.
Our dreams -- those inner desires that reflect our true passions and have the potential to bring us incredible joy -- are as mixed as the dreamers themselves. Yours may be to travel to Kenya, earn an MBA or simply get your driver's licence. "A dream doesn't have to be big; it doesn't have to be important to everybody," says Deanna Rosenswig, coauthor of Dreams Have No Expiry Date (Random House Canada, 2005). "It just has to be something that resonates with you, that's consistent with your values and that gives you hope and pleasure."

No matter what the scope of your dream is, or what stage you're at in terms of your life or fulfilling your heart's desire, these steps will help your dreams come true.

1. Name it
To get in touch with your dreams, sit down by yourself with no distractions so you can hear your own thoughts. Try to open up and be honest about what you feel. Expand your world to include all kinds of possibilities and let your spirit soar, says Ellen Goldhar, a life coach based in Toronto.

Then at the beginning of each training season, she writes down a dream, such as winning a medal. During this process, put the idea of fantasy behind you, advise Rosenswig and coauthor Laurie Gottlieb, because our dreams are only unreal until we articulate them, label them, validate them and make plans to implement them. So, whether you want to scale Mount Everest someday, launch a valuable community group or lead a campaign for a cause you hold dear, get a journal and jot it down.

2. See it
Now that you've identified your dream Goldhar suggests you sharpen your vision using an exercise she calls Vision 10: if whatever you want were to be a 10-out-of-10 experience, what would it look like? Picture it in your mind's eye.

3. Feel it
Once you can see your dream, it's time to feel it. "You've got to feel it to be it," says Goldhar. In What Would You Do If You Had No Fear? (Publishers Group Canada, 2004), Diane Conway writes that she knows how she would feel in her dream home -- once she finds it.

"I realized I'd like to have bright colours, so I painted my existing gate and front door purple. This makes me so happy, and it's a way of achieving some of my dream until it manifests." If your dream is to run a quaint bed-and-breakfast, is it possible to open the door of your current home to guests to get a feel for preparing gourmet breakfasts and offering directions to nearby attractions?
4. Want it
In their book, Gottlieb and Rosenswig suggest you ask yourself the following questions to evaluate whether a particular dream is the one you want to be pursuing.
• Am I animated when I talk about my dream?
• Am I working hard at my dream?
• Even though I feel stress, is the dream worth pursuing?
• Can I see myself inside the dream?
• Does my dream make me smile?
If you answer yes to most of these, then you are on the right track.

5. Imagine it
"You want to get so good at visualizing that you feel like you've experienced your dream before it even comes to life," says Goldhar, who suggests taking 10 minutes before going to sleep each night to visualize and anchor your dream into your subconscious. "Visualizing exactly what living your dream would look like can be a tool that produces unfailing results," adds Conway.

6. Face it
"We all have fears that we have to break through to begin living our dreams," says Conway. Our biggest fears -- regret and time passing -- are actually the biggest incentives to realizing our dreams, says Rosenswig. That said, you need to manage your fears. First, recognize them. For instance, do you worry that realizing your dream may be too hard or take too long? Second, only share your dream with supporters. "At the beginning dreams are delicate because of our own insecurities and self-doubt. You want to nurture the dream and get it to a place where it's healthy," says Goldhar.

7. Let it happen
Check in with your dream every so often. If it begins to feel like a burden, Goldhar says you're no longer dreaming. Perhaps your dream is to start an interior decorating business, but after a little research you realize it's going to take 80 hours a week and that prospect is less than desirable. You may modify your dream and decide you want to work as a designer for someone in the field instead. As Clara says, don't put limits on your dreams. "I'm always moving forward. No matter how difficult it is at the time I always know that I am moving toward something special."

Dream big
So your dream is to walk on the moon, or maybe your Oscar acceptance speech is already written. Deanna Rosenswig, coauthor of Dreams Have No Expiry Date (Random House Canada, 2005), says that it's fine to have a larger-than-life dream as long as not fulfilling it doesn't make you unhappy. "There are dreams that are more in your reach than others, but that's the whole point of dreaming; it's unlimited," says Ellen Goldhar, a life coach.

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Natural remedies for coughing

Natural remedies for coughing

By Natalie Bahadur

Is your cough driving you crazy? Try making some of these natural remedies for coughing at home.

Persistent coughing can be a real drag. It's annoying -- especially to those around you -- and it can really take a toll on your body. If you've suffered from a persistent cough, you know just how taxing it can be -- and how frustrating it is when you can't get rid of it!

But there are many natural remedies for coughing that will help ease the discomfort, and (hopefully) cure it for good.

 But before you hunt down these nantural remedies for coughing, it's important to determine what type of cough you have. We asked naturopathic doctor Camille Nghiem-Phu about the different types of coughs and how to cure them, as well as when to seek medical attention for a persistent cough. 


Types of coughs

According to Nghiem-Phu there are two main classifications of coughs. The first is the dry, non-productive cough, where no mucus is formed. This cough can be sporadic (occurring once or twice daily to clear irritants) or spasmodic (occurring frequently with potential shortness of breath).

The second type of cough is the productive cough, where mucus and irritants from the lungs are formed during the cough. Coughing can be symptomatic of many things, Nghiem-Phu says, including the common cold, bronchitis, croup, whooping cough, pneumonia and tuberculosis. If you've got a persistent cough, be sure to check with your doctor or naturopath to diagnose what type of cough it is and how best to treat it.
 
Do you have a chronic cough?
How do you know the difference between a run-of-the-mill cough and one that's more serious and considered chronic? Nghiem-Phu says that a cough is generally considered chronic when three weeks have passed without it improving. "In the majority of cases, frequent coughing lasts one to two weeks and tapers off as the irritant or infection subsides," she says. Anything more than that is considered a chronic cough.
When to seek professional help for your cough

No one likes to visit the doctor at the first sign of a cough, but there does come a point when you should. According to Nghiem-Phu, you should seek medical attention when your coughing:
 

• is accompanied by a fever and sputum production;
• fails to get better when other symptoms go away;
• changes in character;
• starts to bring up blood;
• interferes with your daily life or sleep cycles; or
• is accompanied by wheezing, shortness of breath or chest pain.
 
Natural remedies for coughing

Cough medicines abound on the shelves of your local drugstore, but there are also many natural remedies for coughing.

"Herbs such as fenugreek, ginger, garlic, licorice and echinacea support the immune system, increase white blood cell activity, are antibacterial and antiviral, reduce fever and congestion, reduce symptoms associated with a cold or flu, and provide antioxidants to help the lungs and lymphatic system rid the body of impurities," says Nghiem-Phu. "Cod liver oil is high in vitamins A and D, which help the mucus membranes to be less hyper-sensitive, and which also reduce inflammation."
 
Someone with a chronic cough can also benefit from eliminating certain mucus- and phlegm-producing foods from their diet, says Nghiem-Phu, such as dairy products, wheat and sugar.

Using natural cough remedies with drugs

Natural remedies can be effective ways to treat a cough, but only if used properly and at the correct potency, says Nghiem-Phu. And be careful about mixing natural treatments with over-the-counter or prescription drugs, as there could be dangerous interactions between the two.

"Your naturopathic doctor is trained to know these possible interactions and to cross-reference all of their natural recommendations against your prescriptive and over-the-counter medications," she says. So be sure to seek a professional opinion first.
Homemade natural remedies for coughing

A natural remedy to soothe your nagging cough could be as close as your kitchen cupboards or refrigerator. Nghiem-Phu recommends the following natural remedies made with items you may already have at home.


• Drinking a warm glass of water with lemon juice and Manuka honey added to it is a great way of increasing your intake of fluid and bioflavonoids. Manuka honey is also a natural antibiotic.

• Drinking herbal teas including fenugreek, rosehip, licorice root, echinacea, lemon with ginger and Manuka honey may help to ease congestion and also provides the body with vitamin C.

• Steam inhalations of eucalyptus oil in a bowl of hot water may temporarily alleviate the nasal congestion associated with the common cold. Lean over the bowl with a towel over your head and spend 10 minutes inhaling the vapours.

• Eating pineapple helps to break down mucus congestion as it contains an ingredient called bromelain, which is an anti-inflammatory.

• Keep hydrated by drinking at least two litres of fluid per day. Dehydration will slow down your recovery time and reduce the amount of metabolic wastes excreted via the kidneys.

• Include plenty of garlic, ginger, chili peppers and horseradish in your diet, as these ingredients will act as decongestants and open up the sinus cavities.

• A supplement of vitamin C powder added to water and gargled will help to provide antioxidants to the respiratory system and help reduce inflammation in the throat. Add some echinacea or olive leaf liquid for an even better throat gargle.

• Get plenty of rest and sleep so that your body recovers properly.
 
Natalie Bahadur is the senior editor of StyleatHome.com and a contributor to canadianliving.com

Thursday, February 16, 2012

Top 5 reasons why we snack

Top 5 reasons why we snack

By Katherine Vankoughnet

Food provides us with the fuel we need to survive and thrive, but there are plenty of other reasons why we find ourselves at the trough, and these triggers are often the culprits behind a derailed diet or
excessive weight gain. Read on for the most common temptation scenarios and tips on how to successfully work through them.

We snack because: We're stressed"People use food to soothe and comfort themselves when they're experiencing an emotion that they either don't want to or don't know how to deal with at the time," explains Susan Wnuk, a Toronto-based clinical psychologist who specializes in eating disorders and weight-related problems. That's why a looming deadline, an overbooked schedule or apprehension about an upcoming event can have us making a beeline for the pantry, whether we realize it or not.

Fight the urge: Be mindful. "Some of my patients have found it helpful to put 'Stop' signs on the door of the cupboard or fridge to help them reconsider why they want to eat," Wnuk says. "If you're not actually hungry, it helps to take a moment to evaluate any pressures or problems affecting you at the moment."

Healthy alternatives: Avoid stimulants like caffeine or refined sugar, which can cause a brief spike in energy followed soon after by an extended crash. Try foods rich in B vitamins, such as bananas, beans and lentils, which have been known to
combat stress.

We snack because: We're sadIt's practically a cliche now -- gorging on buckets of ice cream after a bad breakup or a piece of cake after an unsuccessful job interview. Depression, from its most temporary to its most severe forms, has many of us indulging in the fleeting pleasures of food to fill the void.

Fight the urge: If you're constantly coping by taking comfort in food, Wnuk recommends writing in a journal to help you sort through your feelings and become more aware of your habits. "It's important to remember that food doesn't solve any problems besides hunger," Wnuk advises.

Healthy alternatives: Healthy carbohydrates should be your go-to snack for any pity party you plan to throw. Stick to whole grain pastas and breads to increase your body's production of serotonin: a neurotransmitter that naturally elevates your mood and increases calmness and happiness.

We snack because: We're celebratingWhether it's a steak dinner to mark your big promotion or a bag of chips to reward yourself for doing the laundry, positively reinforcing good behaviour with tasty treats is a dangerous business.

Fight the urge: Keep your rewards restricted to inedible items. Going for a well-deserved
massage or purchasing a much-coveted pair of shoes can bring you satisfaction without sacrificing your waistline.

Healthy alternatives: To honour life's smaller victories grab a piece of fruit. It will satisfy your sweet tooth and help you feel "treated" with the added bonus of upping your intake of fibre and essential vitamins. Try something new and exotic, or a type of fruit that you rarely buy for an added sense of occasion.

We snack because: We're boredEating is a convenient and affordable (and legal!) pleasure-inducing activity that we can literally engage in anytime, anywhere, so it's no wonder that so many of us turn to food -- and more often than not, junk food -- for entertainment or to break up the monotony of our day-to-day lives.

Fight the urge: Get moving. If you're mindlessly grazing by your desk or working your way through a bowl of popcorn in front of the TV, a little change of scenery might help. Go for a
brisk walk around the block or do as many pushups as you can during the commercial breaks to keep your mind from wandering over to your secret candy stash.

Healthy alternatives: Replace your sugary or salty go-tos with
healthier options, such as fruit and nuts, veggies and hummus or low-fat cheese in the places you're most likely to offend.

We snack because: We're procrastinating"I will finish this report, right after I go grab a cookie from the coffee shop down the street." Sound familiar? Food is an easily accessible diversion for those of us who have a tendency to put things off until the very last minute.

Fight the urge: "Eat healthfully and regularly," Wnuk recommends. Frequent well-rounded meals will stave off hunger pangs and sluggishness-inducing dips in blood sugar, and will remove food from the list of tempting distractions.

Healthy alternatives: Lean protein such as fish, poultry or low-fat dairy help increase levels of dopamine and norepinephrine: two naturally occurring brain chemicals that promote alertness and our ability to concentrate on the task at hand.

Saturday, February 11, 2012

How to sleep away the pounds

How to sleep away the pounds

By Dr. Joey Shulman DC, RNCP

Have you ever noticed that you eat more when you're tired?
In addition to a healthy and
balanced diet and regular exercise, a restorative night's sleep can help with the battle of the bulge. According to recent studies published in the Journal of the American Medical Association and the Lancet, lack of sleep can slow down your metabolic function and make it harder to lose weight.
The hormones behind hungerScientists have demonstrated that you can help keep your hunger hormones in check by keeping a healthy sleep routine. Two hormones in particular –
ghrelin, which is responsible for making you feel hungry, and
leptin, which makes you feel full – are affected by your sleep patterns.
When you're
sleep deprived, ghrelin levels increase and leptin levels drop, making you feel hungry and increasing your cravings. When faced with cravings, our tendency is to grab highly processed sweet and starchy snacks, which are a one-way ticket to weight gain. And when you're sleep deprived, feelings of fullness are often delayed, which means you're more likely to keep eating even when you've had enough.
The hormone cortisol also appears to be linked to body weight. Stress or sleep deprivation can cause cortisol levels to rise, and your appetite and cravings will rise right along with it. Excessive cortisol has been linked to a surplus storage of fat, specifically around the mid-section – this is a dangerous place for extra pounds as it can put you at higher risk for heart disease, stroke and cancer.
How much sleep do you need?   In order to keep your hormonal cycle in check, aim for seven to nine hours each night. Think you might be sleep deprived? Ask yourself these questions:
• Do you have difficulty falling asleep?
• Do you wake up a lot during the night?
• Do you wake up too early in the morning and then can't get back to sleep?
• When you wake up, do you not feel rested?
If you have answered 'yes' to any of these questions, it may be time to re-jig your sleep routine to help you
lose those extra pounds.
How to regulate your sleep cycle1. Go to sleep and wake up at the same time each day – even on weekends. Your body thrives on a natural rhythm. If you can
fall asleep within five to seven minutes of hitting the pillow and wake up each day at the same time without an alarm clock, that's a sign of good health.
2. Avoid watching TV, reading the newspaper or working out immediately before bed.
3. Make sure your bedroom is completely dark. Darkness promotes the secretion of the anti-cancer hormone melatonin.
4. Don't go to bed angry! Make amends before heading to bed so you can fully relax.
5. Avoid coffee, tea or
alcohol before bed. Opt for a soothing cup of chamomile tea to lull you to sleep.
If you work in shifts or are caring for a newborn, it can be tricky to
regulate your sleep cycle. Instead, exercise regularly, drink plenty of water, and include plenty of fruits, vegetables, lean proteins and whole grains in your diet. Don't eat starchy or sugary refined foods in an effort to boost energy.
While a good night's sleep won't help you slim down without exercise and a healthy diet, sleep does appear to play an integral role.  Make sure to focus on your sleep habits and have a good night!

Sunday, February 5, 2012

Rankism: Bullying someone of a lower rank at work

Rankism: Bullying someone of a lower rank at work

By Diana Fisher

Racism. Sexism. These attitudes are no longer acceptable in today's enlightened society. And one day, hopefully, a new "ism" will be taboo in our society: Rankism.
Robert Fuller, author of
Somebodies and Nobodies: Overcoming the Abuse of Rank, coined the word "rankism", which is defined as "abusive, discriminatory or exploitative behaviour towards people who have less power because of their lower rank in a particular hierarchy." Basically,
rankism is bullying someone of a lower rank.Tammy, a 30-year-old executive assistant from Ottawa, says that the 18 months she spent working at an insurance firm left her feeling "worthless." "My boss told me that she wouldn't accept mistakes, and that if I was unsure of how to do something, I should ask questions before attempting to do the work," she says. "But when I approached her, she would act annoyed and irritated, and snap at me that the task was 'a no-brainer.' After months of this treatment, my self-esteem was gone. I felt I could do nothing right. In the end, I was breaking down in tears in the bathroom. I knew I had to leave for my own sanity. After quitting that job, I never wanted to work in an office setting again."
Victims of rankism often suffer long-lasting effects from their abusive situations. As a result of
lost confidence, many will have difficulty applying for and acquiring new jobs. Some will seek counselling, and others will require medication in order to pull themselves out of their depressed state.
In Ontario,
the Ontario Human Rights Commission protects against bullying and harassment. It says, "Every person who is an employee has a right to freedom from harassment in the workplace by the employer or agent of the employer or by another employee because of race, ancestry, place of origin, colour, ethnic origin, citizenship, creed, age, record of offences, marital status, family status or disability." It also says ""Every person has a right to equal treatment with respect to services, goods and facilities, without discrimination because of race, ancestry, place of origin, colour, ethnic origin, citizenship, creed, sex, sexual orientation, age, marital status, family status or disability." Bullying or harassment of someone of lower rank, however, is not a violation of the Human Rights Code.
In order to protect employees from abuse by higher-ranked supervisors and managers, the Human Rights Code would have to change. And in order for that to happen, elected officials in each region would have to promote the issue.
The first step to recognizing rankism as a social problem, Fuller believes, is giving it a name. Sexism and racism went through the same processes before they were finally recognized as abusive, debilitating and unacceptable behaviours.
The growing
Dignitarian Movement,
a fairly large movement in the U.S. started about five years ago and gaining popularity in Canada, promotes that everyone has a purpose and a right to fulfill that purpose within a fair and supportive working environment. People in lower positions of rank have important jobs to do, and in their capacity as support staff, they enable those in higher positions to perform their roles more effectively.
Unfortunately, not everyone has this enlightened outlook. If you feel that you are a victim of
bullying, unfair treatment or harassment because of your lower rank on the employment totem pole, start looking for a new job. If there is a Human Resources person associated with your office, report the abusive behaviour so that the complaint is on record. Should you require employment insurance benefits, you will be asked to provide verification that you had no other recourse but to quit. If there is no HR department at your office, consider getting a note from your doctor. Once you have broken out of that suffocating, stressful atmosphere and
found a position in which you are treated fairly, you will be able to thrive and grow as an employee and a person.

Saturday, February 4, 2012

Easy ways to save water at home

Easy ways to save water at home

By Craig Kielburger and Mark Kielburger

Where else in the world do people flood their backyards every winter day to make a hockey rink?
We're a nation of
water wasters, but our hockey-loving habits can be eco-friendly, too…We think of Canada as a world-class country, but half a million Aboriginal Canadians go without access to safe water.
Now compare that to the rest of the country, which uses an astonishing amount of water (an estimated 343 litres per day on average) all available with the easy turn of a tap. Only Americans use more water.
We use and abuse most of this water in our bathrooms. There is nothing like a hot, relaxing bath on a cold winter morning, and afternoon and evening and … you get the point. We love baths and showers. In fact, over 65 percent of the water used at
home is sucked down the bathroom drain.
We've tried to cut our watery ways by speeding up the sudsy soak. But there are better ways to reduce than jumping out with soap still behind our ears. Older toilet models can use as much as 20 litres per flush -- approximately the size of a water cooler jug! Ditch that H20 guzzler for a new and improved edition (some flush close to half a litre of water), which most provinces and municipalities will cover up to $150.
That beloved shower streams 15 to 20 litres a minute straight down the drain. A low-ï¬ow showerhead halves that amount with no noticeable difference in water pressure. Some models come with an easy shut-off button for sudsing. Knowing that you're not wasting water in the washroom? Now that's relaxing…

Garden:

• Plant indigenous plants that need no watering.
• Make sure to water your lawn at dawn or dusk; the yard will evaporate less water and stay moist longer.

Avoid overwatering: a typical lawn requires only one water every four to five days.

Kitchen:

• As if you needed another reason to load up the ol' washer and call it a day, now studies say we conserve more water with a dishwasher than handwashing.• Promise to never throw away water; pour leftover water on plants instead.• Keep your drinking water cold in the fridge, rather than running the faucet until it's cold.• Thaw frozen food overnight, rather than running under hot water.

Bathroom:

• Turn off the tap while brushing teeth.• Troubleshoot your tank. Put a few drops of food colouring in the tank, wait a minute and see if the colour seeps into the bowl. If so, you've sprung a leak, matey!• Place a 2-litre bottle in your tank to displace the water, making sure it doesn't interfere with the pulleys and traps of the tank.Take a look at where we use most of the water in our homes. Where do you think you can cut back?

Excerpted from the book Living Me to We: The Guide for Socially Conscious Canadians © 2012 by Craig Kielburger and Marc Kielburger, published by Me to We. Reprinted with permission from the publisher.

Thursday, February 2, 2012

5 simple steps to a sleep-friendly bedroom

5 simple steps to a sleep-friendly bedroom


By Robin Heron

According to the Canadian Sleep Society, the average adult requires between six and nine hours of sleep per night, and the amount and quality of that sleep directly affects the level of health, memory and alertness we experience in our waking hours. But unless your bedroom is an inviting space where you can unwind away from daytime distractions, it can be difficult to get the rest you need when you need it.
Here are five easy ways to make your bedroom a sleep-friendly sanctuary.

1. UnplugThe first step in making your bedroom into
a positive sleep environment is to say goodbye to the television, computer, cell phone and any other electronics that might be a distraction or reminder of stressful daytime activities. The bedroom should be a place associated with sleep and intimacy, says Dr. Michael Breus, author of
Good Night: The Sleep Doctor's 4-week Program to Better Sleep and Better Health, and by creating a physical and psychological separation between work space and sleep space,
 your bedroom becomes a more relaxing, sleep-focused environment.

2. De-clutterIn the same vein as above, by getting rid of clutter like stacks of magazines, books, paperwork, and knick-knacks you can create an
oasis of calm in your bedroom so that when you settle in for the night there is nothing to sidetrack you from drifting off. Also, organize closets and remove all unfinished to-do projects from the room to keep daytime distractions to a minimum.

3. Lights outNothing is worse than trying to unwind with bulbs blazing overhead, so work on creating some ambient lighting in your bedroom. You can do this by choosing warm, low-wattage bulbs or outfitting lighting with a dimmer switch so you can set the stage for sleep. Then tackle the light pollution that's seeping in through windows from street lamps and sunshine by hanging a set of heavy curtains or blackout shades. Remember to turn off distracting hall lights and move your digital alarm clock to face away from the bed.

4. Sound offNoise distractions big and small can keep even the most exhausted among us from our much-needed sleep, so for starters, a set of heavy curtains may help eliminate sounds from traffic and other outdoor distractions.
You can move a ticking alarm clock away from the bedside table and keep your bedroom door closed to muffle activity from the rest of the household. Also, consider investing in a white-noise maker, which can be particularly effective when dealing with a snoring partner or for shift-workers who sleep during the day.
5. Get comfyStudies say on average we will spend one third of our lives sleeping, so it makes sense to create a space that is as welcoming and as personalized as possible. You can start by choosing
a comfortable and supportive mattress and pillows, and bedding that has a pleasant texture and is seasonally appropriate. To create a calm atmosphere, consider painting your walls soothing colours such as soft blues, tans, yellows or greens, and introduce some sleep-friendly scents like jasmine and vanilla with linen sprays, sachets and scented candles. Also, be sure to keep your room at a cool but pleasant temperature that remains constant throughout the night

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

3 things you're not doing that could lower your debt

3 things you're not doing that could lower your debt

By Renee Sylvestre-Williams
You're paying down your debt and feeling pretty pleased with yourself. That's excellent, because you're on your way to
becoming debt-free.
But are you doing enough? Even if you put aside money every month, pay off more than the minimum and adhere to your budget, these three small things could slow down your debt-repayment schedule -- if you don't deal with them.

1. You're not reading the fine printWe get it -- reading all the fine print on any financial document is an overwhelming proposition. But as irritating as it is, you really should read all documentation, especially anything that involves your credit card, mortgages and other loans. That's the place where you'll find out what happens if you miss a payment or if there'll be any increase in interest rates.
The same goes for your monthly statements. Interest rates can increase. By reading the small print, you might find out that your credit card that had a favourable 12 per cent interest rate has suddenly jumped to 14 per cent. That extra two per cent means a higher proportion of your payment is going to interest than before -- and your debt won't
disappear as quickly.

2. You're not negotiatingAsk and you more than likely will receive. Companies want to keep your business and they want their money -- so call them up and try to negotiate
lower interest rates on your debt, especially on your credit card.
There's no reason to feel awkward about calling your credit card company. Remember, they're used to this and often expect people to call to renegotiate interest rates. Just prepare your script beforehand, remain polite and be realistic with your expectations. You're probably not going to go from 19 per cent to 10 per cent, but a drop of a few percentage points can make a huge difference.

3. You're not changing institutionsSometimes you can't negotiate with your credit card company. If you aren't able to get a reduction in your interest rates, then it might be time to switch cards, or talk to your bank about a loan or line of credit to pay off your credit card balance.
Starting up a new credit card account is not something you should do on a regular basis. In fact, we suggest you do it only if you have to -- and, once you've switched to a lower-interest-rate card, pay off your credit card debt. All of it. Then put the card away and try not to use it.
These three tips seem minor, but what they do is help you increase your awareness about your money, where it goes and how much of it is actually paying off your debt versus how much of it is just covering the interest. Now, go find the paperwork on your credit card and give it a good read.

Monday, January 30, 2012

HANDBOOK 2012

HANDBOOK 2012

Health:

1.      Drink plenty of water.2.      Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner         like a beggar.3.      Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less         food that is manufactured in plants.4.      Live with the 3 E's -- Energy,  Enthusiasm, and Empathy.5.      Make time to practice meditation, yoga, and prayer.6.      Play more games.7.      Read more books than you did in 2011 .8.      Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.9.      Sleep for 7 hours.10.    Take a 10-30 minutes walk every day. And while you walk,         smile.

Personality:

11.    Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what         their journey is all about.12.    Don't have negative thoughts or things you cannot control.         Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.13.    Don't over do. Keep your limits.14.    Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.15.    Don't waste your precious energy on gossip.16.    Dream more while you are awake.17.    Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.18.    Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner with his/her mistakes of the past.           That will ruin your present happiness.19.    Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.20.    Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.21.    No one is in charge of your happiness except you.22.    Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn.         Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away         like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime. 23.    Smile and laugh more.24.    You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

Society:

25.    Call your family often.26.    Each day give something good to others.27.    Forgive everyone for everything.28.    Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.29.    Try to make at least three people smile each day.30.    What other people think of you is none of your business.31.    Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your          friends will. Stay in touch.

Life:

32.    Do the right thing!33.    Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.34.    GOD heals everything.35.    However good or bad a situation is, it will change.36.    No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.37.    The best is yet to come.38.    When you awake alive in the morning, thank GOD for it.39.    Your Inner most is always happy. So, be happy 

--
By Joe